Despite the fact that millions of men throughout history have used prostate play and massage to increase sexual enjoyment and pleasure, only now are we waking up to this in the western world and getting over the anal thing to enjoy all the fantastic fun the prostate can deliver.

Even straight guys are exploring their ass more these days, with millions of men around the world waking up to their prostate in their quest to find new and interesting experiences and sensations to enjoy.

So what is the prostate and what can playing with it do for you?

The prostate is the gland which is considered to be the epicenter of the male climax. Located behind the penis and accessed through the anus, it is an incredibly sensitive area when massaged and played with.

Using toys or even a well placed finger can offer the male an immense and often intense sensation which is slightly different to that experienced through sex or masturbation.

Regular practitioners of prostate massage can often experience a constant state of pleasure when probing the glad, issuing a sticky fluid while they explore the area and experience the waves of pleasure. After a while, many men can experience a constant state of continuous pleasure on the scale of an orgasm while they massage the area, and only fully ejaculate when they allow pleasuring of the penis. When the final climax is achieved (either through direct penis masturbation or prostate play) the intensity of the climax can be quite extreme, with many claiming that the orgasm and pleasure they experience is several times more powerful than a traditional orgasm.

In addition to the increased pleasure, many who practice prostate stimulation also report an increased ejaculation, with more force and a greater amount of cum.

Not only can prostate stimulation be incredibly beneficial for pleasure and sex, but it’s actually good for your health too. Massaging the prostate increases the blood flow around the gland. This helps to maintain the health of this gland, much like masturbation does, but with a little more focus on the gland itself.

You do not need to do it, but many professionals now believe that regular prostate massage, when done correctly, can increase the general health of the prostate, maintain healthy semen production and reduce the risk of developing prostate cancer.

Check out this video to get an idea of prostate milking.

Tips

• It is recommended that a prostate massager designed for the purpose be used as the finger is generally not long enough. You should never put anything up there not designed for the purpose.

• Always use water based lube as silicone or oil based lubricants are considered unsafe for use with toys.

• Seek medical advice if you are unsure of anything or experience unexpected discomfort.

• Take it slow.

• Don’t expect immediate increase of orgasm or semen. It takes practice but is very rewarding.

• Use an anal douche to clean the area first and make the entire process much cleaner and more pleasant.

• Have fun, and don’t be too “anal” about it all!

I recently read an interesting statistic presented by an article in the Times newspaper (UK) which stated that there are almost twice as many bisexual women as there are bisexual men. This began to make me think about the male same-sex research that I have done previously, and how male sexuality might be primarily influenced by social stigma and perception.

It is estimated that 2.8% of women state that they are bisexual, while only 1.8% of men state the same. But from my own research, it seems that many men recognize an appreciation for cock without ever making the change to declaring bisexuality, or even curiosity.

To these men, the act of watching other men having sex, masturbating, or even actually jerking off with another guy, does not propel them to question their sexuality. To them, they are simply straight guys who have a fetish or an appreciation for the penis or a specific sexual act – usually masturbation.

While my early research did reflect the expected low % of open bisexuality in male respondents, almost 30% of the men suggested that they were bi-curious – more men suggested that they were curious about male/male sex than identified as bisexual.

Through my research I have certainly formed the opinion that far more men who identify as heterosexual enjoy the idea of limited male/male sexual experiences than there are men who state that they are bisexual.

So why is this?

I firmly believe that male sexuality is far more complex than we are led to believe. Fetish plays its part, with a desire to watch a cock being enjoyed right at the top of the list for many men (just look at how much cock there is in straight porn!) and this attraction to the penis often confuses men who believe that they must choose a label and accept the lifestyle and all sexual acts which traditionally correspond.

Of course, the idea that a guy must have anal sex with other men in order to accept that he has a fetish for cock is nonsense, but social rules dictate that men must decide between the three specific groups.

If this shows anything, it shows that we needed the additional label of bi-curious to fill the void where many men find themselves. To state that you are bisexual is not acceptable to these men because it implies that they are “greedy” or somehow incapable of monogamy. To state that they are homosexual would of course not be accurate because they love sex with women. So there needed to be a place in-between where guy could enjoy their limited cock play with other guys, while continuing their heterosexual relationships with women and avoiding the social stigma of being bisexual.

The only problem now is making bi-curiosity as socially acceptable as bisexuality, heterosexuality and homosexuality. Thankfully, the teens out there right now are making these moves away from the labels and doing what they like with their friends of both sexes, spurred on by the imagery and information they find on-line. The journey will not be as long and difficult for them as it was for us, because they know how many of them there are, and a conversation is only a screen away.

We probably all do it at least once in our lives, and many of us do it on a regular basis. Cruising is the art of picking up a guy in a public or semi-public location for some anonymous sex, often within walking distance of the place you met them.

There are numerous places all over the world renowned for cruising, and almost every major city or town has a park or other place where guys go, usually in the evenings, to hook up with other guys for anonymous sex.

You have probably even walked through one of these areas without even knowing it, and maybe that guy who gave you a menacing look when you passed him sitting on that deserted park bench was actually inviting you to play?

So this post is all about explaining the situation to all those out there who might have thought about it but have not been too sure, or know what to do or where to go.

Although the above image from HighOctane shows two guys fucking outside, cruising is less about anal sex and more about oral and even just jerking off. There are actually a lot of closeted guys and curious straight men who go to these places looking for some cock to cock fun and wouldn’t consider fucking a guy in a bedroom never mind out in the open.

The primary urge for most men cruising is to shoot some cum in the company of another dude, and while this can be achieved through personal ads and on-line hook-up’s cruising allows for more anonymity and for guys to keep their activities away from their home. Perhaps they don’t have the privacy where they live. But another part of it is the expectation of finding just the right guy there. And of course, it’s quick and simple. Every guy is there for the same reason, so just attending is usually enough to guarantee sex, whereas an on-line hook-up might take time and conversation.

For guys just starting out, I would always suggest that you make sure you’re ready to accept the consequences of your actions. While it is increasingly rare, cruising grounds are often monitored by local authorities and arrests made when possible. It is a criminal offense for anyone to have sexual relations out in public, whether you’re gay or straight (there may be one or two places where this isn’t the case, but it is rare for there not to be a law prohibiting outdoor sex or nudity).

Finding a cruising ground is pretty easy. There are websites listing places by country, city and so on, like CruisingForSex for instance. But there are also local gay communities and sites where you might be able to find information on local sites.

If you can, tell someone where you are going, and don’t go at night. You want to make sure you are familiar with your surroundings and this is a lot harder to do in the dark. Safety comes first, and you need to make sure your phone is ready to go if you need to use it, and that you know where you are and how to get home.

Don’t get drunk or high before heading out. It might help you to relax and be more adventurous, but it also lowers your ability to make proper decisions and correctly assess your surroundings. You need to have a clear head and be able to trust your instincts, and clouding your thoughts with alcohol or drugs will certainly not help you. Plus, you don’t want to find an amazing hunk who wants to suck you off only to find you can’t keep it up!

Wherever possible, find info on the area and check for news and the reputation of the site. The website mentioned above is a great resource for finding out this information as shared by other users, so pay attention to this info and use it to make an informed decision.

Don’t feel pressured into anything. If you just want to feel another dudes dick in your hand, tell them you want to jerk off only. If they try to persuade you to do more, only go as far as you are comfortable going and leave if they are not happy about that. This is an exchange of sexual experience, not a lesson. You don’t need anyone telling you what you want to do or what feels good.

From experience, cruising is pretty easy once you start, and you’ll pick up on the slight glances and looks from other guys as you pass them. This all depends on the location of course, but you’ll probably find a few groups of guys just hanging out and chatting, looking out for someone new. Or you might have a guy walk past you and give you a certain look. If you look back and happen to see him doing the same, chances are he’ll slow down or stop, and there you have your invite to go over and say Hi.

It’s really not as dangerous or scary as some might think, and it can actually be quite rewarding in some ways. Guys often build friendships and find long-term sexual partners through these activities, and wherever you go for your first cruising experience, you’ll probably see that there are lots of guys who know each other.

The most important advice is be safe and use common sense. But have fun. You only live once!

]]> http://gaylocker.com/2011/04/22/cruising-tips-for-beginners/feed/ 0 http://gaylocker.com/2011/04/17/the-truth-about-penis-enlargement/ http://gaylocker.com/2011/04/17/the-truth-about-penis-enlargement/#comments Sun, 17 Apr 2011 16:25:59 +0000 conran http://gaylocker.com/?p=944

Okay, forget the pills and potions. If you hadn’t already come to the realisation yourself, there is no cream or supplement you can take that will specifically focus on the tissues of the penis to suddenly make it bigger!

It amazes me when I see such claims and it worries me that guys might think they actually work. I saw an ad just a few days ago which claimed that they had “unlocked the secret” and created a creamy substance that you just rub into your meat and you can gain an extra inch. If that were the case, you’d need to wear gloves or end up with extra long and fat fingers on one hand. And what happens if it touches your balls, do they get bigger too?

It is of course complete nonsense, and if it were not so dangerous and risky it would be laughable.

However, my intention here is to share with you some things which DO work. Just in case you’re interested in making the little Mr. a little wider or longer. First though, you should be reminded that size does not matter. While many of us are simply greedy and will use any excuse to play with some cock – and the more there is the better for us greedy cock worshippers – some have some serious concerns about their genitals. In such cases I would always suggest that medical advice be sought.

This post is for those who want to get a bigger cock for the fun of it or the fetish, not for improving self-confidence or sexual health.

So we’ve established that the pills and potions do not work. It is simply not possible. So what are the options?

• Penis Pumps – You might be surprised to hear me say that they DO work. As has been pointed out on this great site for Wanking Toys, Penis Pumps do increase girth and sometimes length too, but it’s generally considered to be temporary. It’s a great option for an immediate size difference if you want more to stroke or give to a buddy, but it’s doubtful that any of them will be a permanent solution.

• Penis Stretchers – These also work, and the method has actually been proven over time through various means and methods. Using a product like the Male Edge Penis Enlarger, the skin and body of the shaft is stretched over time, which encourages the creation of new tissues and cells. In turn this creates a longer and thicker penis. The same process is used throughout medicine to create new skin for grafting and even stretching of bones for increasing sever height problems. The stretching of tissue and skin has also been proven to work for foreskin restoration.

• Surgery - Of course there is the surgical method. But like all surgery, this comes with significant risks, including permanent impotence and loss of sensation. And even then only inch or so can be gained. It’s painful, but quick, but so is death in battle and I wouldn’t want to do that either.

• Jelqing - This is a manual method of increasing length and girth through what is effectively a massaging technique. The penis is gripped at the base in the ring of an “OK” hand gesture, then the hand is moved along the length of the flaccid shaft. You’re basically milking the penis. The blood is trapped and forces the inner chambers to expand, increasing their capacity over time. I have seen it reported that this works, but I would imagine that dedicated hours every week would need to spent in this activity to see any result.

As I mentioned above, I believe that if you are going for any of these methods to get a bigger penis, it should be for the right reasons. Many of us have fetishes and desires to change our appearance and find new ways to play, and when it comes to self enjoyment, by all means go ahead. But if your reasons are related to feelings of inadequacy or you feel that your sexual enjoyment is suffering because of the size of your penis, these methods are really not for you, at least not until you have sought some help from a medical professional.

A while ago I read an article from AskMen about Locker Room etiquette that left me a little bemused.

You see, I view the gym as a place to hang out with my buddies. Quite literally hanging out. It’s not a gay gym, and not all my buddies are (openly) into cock but it’s not one of those places where having your junk out in the open is a problem.

I’ve had many admiring glances in the locker room, and even when I haven’t been in the mood to be cruising for straight guys I’ve had quite a few opportunities to hook up with curious men.

Image Courtesy High Octane

CLICK TO VISIT HIGH OCTANE

Which is perhaps why a few points they raised in the article annoyed me a little.

Their very first point of contention is when they suggest that men keep their eyes to themselves. I’m sorry, but if a guy walks past with a massive floppy dick swinging about, or a visible semi (which is so common it’s laughable) I’m gonna be taking a little look! And what’s the problem anyway? Are guys scared about other dudes seeing their dick? They do know we have one too right?

Another suggestion they make is that guys shouldn’t be naked for too long. How long is too long? Should I scurry away and hide in a corner to get changed, or should I try that move where you pull your pants on under a wet towel?

Do I need a stopwatch so I can make sure my cock isn’t out in the wild for longer than they suggest? And if only they did suggest how long was a reasonable time to be naked – in a room solely used for members of the same sex to get naked!

I’m tempted to contact the author and remind him of what the word “Gym” actually means. It derives from the Greek word Gym-nos, meaning naked. Gymnasiums were intended to be a place where men could be naked and comfortable.

Personally, I view the gym locker room as a place I can be naked in the company of other men without it being a problem. It might be erotic for some of us, but we get that it’s not erotic for all.

I’m gonna have to say that I think the author of that article has some problems either with his body image or his sexuality. Guys secure in their sexuality and image generally don’t have such prudish attitudes to nudity, and I’m pretty sure many guys – straight, bi or gay – would view his opinions as a little over the top. The guys I see in the locker room every week certainly don’t live by his rules, I’m very glad to say!

After my last post I thought I’d talk about something that has become somewhat of a growing underground industry if the Internet activity is to be believed. Foreskin restoration is one of those things that perhaps many are considering or thinking about, and have until recently not fully grasped how easy it actually is.

There are now forums and social groups all over the internet dedicated to discussing methods and practical solutions to help guys re-grow what they lost. And after taking a look at Google search trends, it seems clear that there has been a significant jump in the number of searches by guys seeking to change their cut cock back into an uncut one.

So, I wonder just how popular this idea is from an external perspective. As gay guys who presumably love the cock and everything about it, do you prefer your guys cut or au-natural? If you took a hunk home and tugged down his shorts to find a hooded bone like that of Nick Toretto, would it just make you even hungrier or would it turn you off?

Nick Toretto's Uncut Meat - Courtesy of CollegeDudes

And if you find it a turn on, have you considered growing your skin back?

I’m uncut, and I love foreskin myself, and being into Body Modification a little I’m quite interested in foreskin stretching and development. My foreskin covers the whole head when soft, and then slides back when hard. But I would like to have a longer hood like Nick Toretto’s. There’s just more to play with, and I love playing with other guys who have a lot of it too.

And it has to be mentioned that those who have restored also feel a significant increase in sexual sensation too. Which isn’t really surprising when you consider that the head of the penis is supposed to be the most sensitive part. This sensitivity can only decrease over time through exposure and friction.

Thankfully, it’s really easy to do using the basic principles of Body Modification – which is primarily stretching the skin – just as punks with piercings sometimes stretch their earlobes with rings and make tunnels. The skin is very flexible, and over time, with constant and careful stretching, a complete foreskin can be grown to cover the glands. I’ve seen some guys report complete coverage of the head within six months, and that was starting from nothing!

Of course, all it takes is a little imagination and DIY know-how to start stretching yourself, but for those who have no clue, check out the global leader in foreskin restoration – The TLC Tugger.

]]> http://gaylocker.com/2011/04/13/are-you-a-foreskin-fanatic/feed/ 1 http://gaylocker.com/2011/04/12/five-steps-to-a-bigger-cum-shot/ http://gaylocker.com/2011/04/12/five-steps-to-a-bigger-cum-shot/#comments Tue, 12 Apr 2011 19:42:40 +0000 conran http://gaylocker.com/?p=924

I know some pretty hardcore guys, I have to say. Some of the guys I meet cruising are really into it, and while I might head out to the local park once or twice a month to check out who’s around for some mutual jerking and maybe some oral, some of the dudes are there every night getting into a whole lot more.

One of the guys I met cruising is a professional stripper. But he doesn’t just get his kit off. He does the occasional jerk off and sex show with a willing audience member on stage too if the money is right.

Knowing that I do a lot of research and writing on sexual issues he asked me for some tips on betting a bigger load. He says he’d like to put on a really impressive show for a live jerk off gig he has booked in a couple of months. So here a few of the top tips I shared with him:

1. Quit Smoking. I know loads of guys are gonna groan at this (like you don’t get enough of this from your doctor!) but smoking is a major factor in all kinds of general health issues including sexual health. Impotence, fertility and ejaculation are primary areas affected by smoking.

2. Drinking. Excessive alcohol intake is definitely another issue when it comes to semen and general health too. So if you want a bigger cum load you’d better be prepared to cut it out for a while if you drink more than average.

3. Eat Healthy. Goes without saying, but specifically increasing your vegetable and fruit intake while lowering dairy and meats is a good step.

4. Peanuts. I know it might be strange, but it is said that eating a few handfuls of peanuts twelve hours before your session will increase your load. There’s little written evidence for this, but I’ve seen it said and some guys swear by it.

5. Water. Might be obvious, but plenty of us drink far too little water every day. Dehydration is probably one of the most severely limiting factors when it comes to semen production. All the vitamins and minerals will help, but without enough water in your system it’s a lot harder for them to do their job.

So there you have my top five tips for increasing your load, why not give them a try and get back to me, let me know how it goes?

It’s a fantasy for many of us isn’t it? A really hot straight guy gets a little curious and one day he’s so horny he decides to let you have a taste. I think we all have those straight men in our lives somewhere; a colleague,  a fellow student, a guy at the bar, your fag-hag’s hot younger brother…

And most of us treat it as just that; a fantasy. If a guy says he’s straight then that’s it, there’s no getting around that. Or is there?

Image Courtesy BrokeStraightBoys

A few years ago I joined an adult forum where guys and girls talk about sex, masturbation, porn and relationships. And I was really surprised to find a very active section dedicated to guys who view themselves as straight in every other way, but have a fetish for jerking off with other guys.

Now, your reaction is probably the same as mine was at that time. I immediately cried foul and suggested that these guys were either gay or bi and that they were in denial. And I kept up this idea until someone pointed out that a guy can have a fetish for wearing lacy knickers and still be straight, and that a guy can have a kink for leather and it doesn’t make him a biker – a foot fetish doesn’t make you a chiropodist.

Correctly, they pointed out that sex is just one aspect of being gay. It’s also about who you fall in love with, the things you enjoy in life, your social circle, and (perhaps vitally) how you identify yourself sexually. They also pointed out that these labels are man-made. We created them, not nature. Same sex encounters happen all the time in nature, but no other species is shown to treat one form of sex as in any way  different to another. Our own self-imposed rules about sexuality don’t even cover all of us. There are tribes where male mutual masturbation is seen as nothing more considerable than guys socialising. Even in our own culture guys share porn and masturbation as teenagers, before allowing this to end when they discover the opposite sex. But what if guys chose not to let that brief period of teenage exploration end?

Spurred on by the idea that male masturbation was a fetish, and that many more guys than we currently accept would be open to the idea of it, I started some research a few years ago asking straight men what their opinions were when it came to porn and same-sex encounters. And the results were extremely surprising.

There were hundreds of responses from heterosexual, bisexual and homosexual men from numerous backgrounds, countries and lifestyles.

Firstly, when asked about the kinds of porn they enjoy, 52% of heterosexual men taking part stated that they enjoy watching men masturbating. This was deliberately presented as solo, duo or group male masturbation and does not suggest that footage of guys jerking while they have sex with a girl (or girls) is inclusive.

I also asked these straight men what they would choose if they had to decide between watching a video of a male masturbating or a female. 39.5% of these straight men chose the male jerk off.

The straight guys were asked whether they would jerk off with another guy while watching porn together if a friend suggested it, and 80% of them suggested that they would consider it. Only 20% gave a negative response.

So what does this brief snippet of data mean? I think it means that we have a somewhat warped sense of male sexuality, and that even men who live completely heterosexual lives in every other respect also consider masturbation to be a fetish.

If we use the labels we currently accept, far more men could easily be described as bisexual. Although they would fight that description (rightly so in my opinion) there really are many millions of men around the world who live heterosexual lives in every way, but would love the opportunity to share some mild same-sex activities with male friends. I’m inclined to believe that this is as much about friendship and bonding as it is about a genuine fetish for cock and wanking. But the fact remains that many more guys than we would ever have expected are interested in some sexual activity with other guys.

Is it really controversial or shocking? I don’t think so. I think it simply exposes a very basic fetish that we have otherwise overlooked. Just as straight men have an appreciation for big boobs or lesbian sex, isn’t it reasonable to consider that the greatest fetish is actually for the most basic and common sexual activity of all?

As a group of people, we have fought for equality and struggled to break down the walls. And with the help of the internet and anonymous access to sexual inspiration of various kinds, men are finally finding that they are not alone or strange in their sexual interests. Whether you think it is right or wrong that a guy can call himself straight while enjoying these activities is not for you to judge or condemn. You have the right to call yourself whatever you like and identify with any group of people you feel approprite, but at the same time that right should not be viewed differently as it applies to others.

And ultimately, isn’t it a good thing that many more men are now actively exploring their same-sex desires? Whatever they call themselves, it just gives men (gay, straight, curious or bi) more guys to play with!

After the revelations of the research, and writing a comprehensive ebook on the subject, it has given me the opportunity to have sexual relationships with plenty of men who would be “otherwise straight”. Some just like to jerk off to porn with a friend, most like to swap hands, and some are a little more daring and eventually consider themselves bisexual. And I have found that all it takes is a comfortable environment, some beer and adequate porn.

So if you have a few straight guys in your life you’d love to try getting it on with, half of them probably would given the right opportunity, it’s learning how to cross that line comfortably that’s the main issue. But in the meantime you could join sites like the B8M8Network, where straight, bi and gay guys find others for mutual masturbation. You can also read more about this subject (and check out the ebook) over at MensSexAdvisor.

Have an opinion? Tell me what you think below.

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